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1992-11-02
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TO THE GLORY OF GOD
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Study No. 5
PROVIDING GUIDANCE FOR YOUR CHILDREN
Scripture Reading: Proverbs 4.
From the day that a child first arrives in the home, parents are
preparing them to leave. This will either be done by intelligent
design or the lack of it. God has given every parent approximately
eighteen years in which to plant in their children the wisdom,
intelligence and now-how to face life in such a way that honours God,
contributes to society, blesses the church, and as a by-product, meets
the deep needs of that individual.
Guidance is an extremely important part of that preparation process.
Parents institute by their actions the whole idea of guidance. The
child in later life will often fail to seek guidance if his role
models stated by their example it was unnecessary.
1. What Is Guidance?
"Guide" - one who leads or directs another in his way; something
that provides a person with directional information; signpost; one
who directs a person in his conduct or course of life.
"Guidance" - the act or process of leading or directing; the
process of controlling the course of a projectile by a built-in
mechanism.
2. Why Is Guidance Necessary?
a. To keep one from destruction. (Prov. 2:16-19; Matt. 6:13)
b. To receive the blessing of spiritual promise. (Is. 58:11; John
16:13; Psalm 139:2)
3. How Does God Give Direction And Guidance To His Children?
The pattern for man in relation to his children is given by God in
relationship to us. There are four basic ways God has designed
for His children to receive the wisdom that is necessary in order
to make right choices in life.
a. INSTRUCTION: (Gen. 3:1-3) - God instructed Adam and Eve as to
the path of life (Prov. 1:8,9; 4:11-13).
b. EXPERIENCE: (Gen. 3:1-6) - God gave opportunity for Adam and
Eve to learn by experience (Gen.3:22; 30:27).
c. FAILURE: (Gen.3:14,17) - God showed the cause and effect
relationship of sin to the curse in relation to their own
failures and each other's failures.
1) Personal failure - Prov. 15:31
2) Failure of Others - Prov. 224:30-34
d. EXAMPLE: (Gen. 1-3) - God provides the example that we are to
follow by virtue of who He is. (2 Cor. 6:17,18; Prov. 4:11)
4. In What Ways Do Parents Provide Counsel And Guidance?
a. INSTRUCTION: (Prov. 5:1-5)
Parents instruct their children on what choices are right and
what choices are wrong. They also provide for them how to make
right choices by judging and analyzing a situation.
b. EXPERIENCE:
Parents provide opportunities for their children to gain from
life experiences by giving them the responsibility of making
some of their own choices in areas of personal freedom.
Discussing the results of their choices in areas such as use of
finances, use of time, selection of friends, etc. provides an
extremely relevant guidance that they can use in those areas
the rest of their lives.
c. FAILURE:
One of the most valuable forms of guidance a parent can share
with his child is the account of some of their own personal
failures in life, the results of those failures and what they
have learned through them. Parents can also provide guidance
by discussion of the failures of others - this kind of
discussion has a biblical base. Many biblical accounts are of
failures - not in a gossiping manner, but as signposts of the
wrong route to go in a specific area of life.
d. EXAMPLE:
Parents also provide guidance through their own example -
making right choices automatically leads the child to do the
same. The process of seeking counsel in various areas on the
part of parents leads the child to believe that one does not
always lean on his own narrow viewpoint - that in the multitude
of counsellors there is a wisdom one can gain that one may not
already have. Another method of providing guidance is on
matters of decision or choice. This creates an openness to
receive from others.
5. In What Areas Do Children Need Guidance?
a. SOCIALLY:
1) The selection of friends.
2) The principles of relating to people.
3) The process of mending relationships.
4) The ability to conduct oneself publicly.
5) The ability to solve problems.
6) The choice of a marriage partner.
b. SPIRITUALLY:
1) The blessing of right choices.
2) How to make the Bible relate to life.
3) The folly of wrong choices.
4) Direction in ministry involvement.
5) How to receive direction from God.
6) How to lead others to righteousness.
7) How to build a good relationship with God.
c. PERSONALLY:
1) The use of time.
2) How to maintain good health.
3) How to view one's self.
4) How to face fear of the future.
d. VOCATIONALLY:
1) How to enjoy your work.
2) How to choose a career.
3) How to find a job.
4) Should I go to college, and if so, where?
5) How to discipline oneself in school or work.
6) How to avoid becoming a workaholic.
e. MORALLY:
1) How to handle thought life.
2) What sex is all about (appropriate to age-level).
3) How to recognise and avoid moral pitfalls.
f. FINANCIALLY:
1) What place does money have in life?
2) How to spend money wisely.
3) How to save money.
4) How much to tithe.
5) How to avoid or get out of debt.
6) What to think and do about credit.
7) What charitable contributions should not be made.
g. PHYSICALLY:
1) The value of recreation.
2) How to maintain self-discipline in eating habits.
3) The obvious follies of drug and alcohol abuse.
The focus of guidance in the home is on values and methods. From
birth to marriage the parents provide guidance as the right value
system and the specific practical steps on how to reach any
valuable objective. Parents are the chief source of counsel for
their children. They cannot afford to leave that responsibility
to others or wait always for the child to come and ask for it.
END of STUDY FIVE